Breaking News: The Big Announcement

Written by Victory Bell on .

Siesta Motel, Colfax, WA (Reuters)-

After four weeks of tense negotiations, the WSU Football Blogfathers emerged from a dark, smoke filled room to issue their statement about the future of the WSU Football Blog.

The group’s lead negotiator, Coug-A-Sutra, guarded closely by his agent,  Skippy Dupree....

sauntered up to the mic to make what was initially billed as a "brief and concise" opening statement.  He said:

“When we entered into tough, deliberate negotiations with Bloguin four weeks ago, we had a difficult decision to make…. On one hand, we all really wanted to resign...."

"But even with our overarching need and desire for confidence, correspondence, continuance, and dare I say in the Jeffersonian sense "good continence", we also all knew that the current path was not sustainable.  And so we came here today conjointly joined; armed with a common purpose...Yes, we came here today to pursue that one course of responsible action that fit the needs of Cougar Nation--- not only for winning football, but for a winning cybercenegenic spirit....

....Yes, dear nation, on this day of reckoning, it is with a very heavy heart that I stand before you today at the Siesta Motel, in beautiful downtown Colfax, in the grand state of W-A, to make this final, penultimate announcement,  And that announcement is to say that we, the WSU Football Blog, together will all of our dearest friends, foes, allies, enemies, and clandestine lovers have decided to.."

(Read on)

“Re-sign.”

And with that news, the crowd of 3 (three’s a crowd) at the Siesta Bar promptly resumed their night of drinks, pull-tabs, and pills….

A few minutes later, a jubilant Longball emerged from the women’s washroom, took out a cigar from his breast pocket, lit up, and described the week’s course of events. 

He said:

“Basically, the whole process was like trying to sign 4 free agents at once with no money or resources.  The first step for all of us was Sean saying that he was coming back.  I mean, once we had Sean, we had a center, a core, a soul, a BIG TOE if you will..”

“From there, it was one giant cakewalk. Once Sean re-signed, I instantly agreed to a 6 year, Max deal.”

“But then we had to re-sign, Huddy.  You see, given the huge success that "Humpday with Huddy" had with the Mascot rankings and what not, the Penguins and Ben Koo tried to lure him to start a new children's blog, replete with a whole Beta site called “Tickle-time with Timmy.” 

Thankfully, Huddy wanted none of that, so he too signed a six year max deal.”

“And so, when we had no additional money or resources left on the table, we turned to our main man, the Mike Gminski of blogging…

...who we still call, The Coug-A-Sutra. In essence, we basically told him that we have no money, no resources, no nothing left to offer.  Of course, he thought that sounded great, so we asked him to sign his contract by sticking his tongue on a frozen rod....

Of course, he did, and that was that..”

+++++

Later, outside the Motel, Coug-A-Sutra offered several cautions to the Millions of Readers of the WSUFB site. 

“We’re turning the clock back with this announcement,” he said. “In the days of old, we’d write about sports for about 6 months out of the year, not 12.  And for the other half, we’d write about whatever came up:  TV shows, Movies,  Pilates, 5-7-5 Haikus, Macrame....”

“And so, when we say we’re giving this another go, or another go-round, we’re essentially saying that we’re committing ourselves to be ourselves, or not, whenever we want and wherever we want..... Essentially, anything goes from now on round this here blog...."

And as the Yuletide season falls once again on the great people of Cougar Nation, it seemed comforting to know that, for this section of the world at least, the song will remain essentially the same.

All for now. Go Cougs!
 

16 comments
Evercoug
Evercoug

Great news! Looking forward to a few more decades of excellence!

 

It'll be interesting to see what non-sports related topics you guys come up with. 

 

Nice job holding the press conference at the Siesta. That's my home away from home, love that place......

Ambush184
Ambush184

Best newe all day, maybe this week. South Sound Cougar Club meets at Rivers Edge @ the Tumwater Valley Golf Course tomorrow night @ 5:30. Be there to help rehash the best win in 5 years.

oldsavage
oldsavage like.author.displayName 1 Like

 @Huddy @Sutra Best news since my ex-wife told me she was moving her bed downwind. 

Huddy
Huddy like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

Meanwhile, a nation mourns the loss of Tickle Time with Timmy.

CougX
CougX like.author.displayName 1 Like

Great news, you guys are a dedicated group and are true Cougs all the way...I was not looking forward to having a wsufootballblog - less off season.. Thanks boys

Danesh
Danesh like.author.displayName 1 Like

awesome news to start the day to!!! without this blog, the office would feel more and more like a gulag! great to have you all coming back!

NavyCoug
NavyCoug like.author.displayName 1 Like

Awesome. Would have been really bummed to see the site go. I believe I read this in one of the other posts, but I liked the idea of an "Ask Amieable" day. Sort of like on ESPN when Pac-12 Blogger Ted Miller answers questions. Except these questions will be about a team I actually care about.

PCHogs
PCHogs like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

That is AWESOME!  Thanks boys, from the bottom of my bottom

TruCoug89
TruCoug89 like.author.displayName 1 Like

Happy to see this

Best Wazzu Commentary

World a better place

TruCoug89
TruCoug89 like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

Without this here blog

All I would have is Jim Moore

And my life would suck

jsfranklin.wsu
jsfranklin.wsu

I had to read that twice as I didn't see the hyphen in "re-sign" haha... Glad you guys are keeping the blog! It's a great outlet to discuss everything without the censorship of cougcenter. I mean I love cougcenter and their stats are great, but sports for me is always been a mental AND emotional outlet. When my teams are bad, why would I want to waste time supporting WHY they're bad when all I want to do is vent with people that understand? I want to look at all that stuff when we're GOOD because it makes me feel even more excited! Hopefully when we're good again, some of your old authors will pop up along with the new ones and this blog will be one big celebration! haha

Sutra
Sutra

@jsfranklin.wsu good to be back. Hopefully, we can find a way to break the bowl drought BOTH Cougar blogs have endured from the beginning...

Stiffmiester
Stiffmiester like.author.displayName 1 Like

 @Sutra What did Khan get?  Longball's cigar stub?  Welcome back gents

 

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